Do you know what it's like to be alone all day?  I'm so lonely.  No one to talk to. I used to be the type of person who had loads of friends.  I was the one who would talk to everyone and anyone.  I did have two very good friends.  But, unfortunantely, as I grew sicker my friends grew more distant.  It's a common thing for people to disappear from your life when you are going through an illness.  Especially when you have a chronic illness.  I changed.  My illness changed me.  My emotions are changed.  My entire life is changed.  I no longer can do the things I once did.

I am very lucky to have a loving family.  A husband who cares for me without thought for himself.  He has proven time and time again that his love for me is forever.  For this I am grateful.  I am proud to be his wife.  My children are loving and I am proud of them.  But, they go about their business.  And, well they should.  I would not expect anything else.  I am not one of those mother's who want their lives to stop because mine is different.

It has just be hard for me to find my nitch.  A new nitch.  I am not complaining.  I am just thinking how much different things have become.