JUST ME

Edith Sitwell:

I am not eccentric. It's just that I am more alive than most people. I am an unpopular electric eel set in a pond of goldfish.

Sounds good to me.  Webster defines eccentric as:

1 a : deviating from an established or usual pattern or style b : deviating from conventional or accepted usage or conduct especially in odd or whimsical ways
synonym see STRANGE

I am me.  Always have been me.  Strange, maybe.  Who cares really?  Weird, who knows?  I surely don't.  Remember, I'm a changeling, a Pure Angel.  The quizzes don't lie, right?  LOL  I have always "Walked to the beat of a different drummer!"  I particularly like the part of the quote that says that she is an unpopular electric eel set in a pond of goldfish.  Sounds a bit like me.  Not really as harsh as it reads, but basically true.  I'm not in attack mode like the electric eel.  But, I do stand out, that is right.  I can start a conversation with just about anyone.  Yup, ..........that's where the weird thing comes in (or the Pure Angel, however you choose to look at it).  I don't think its weird, others do.  Have always been like that.  As a little girl Mom says I would start conversations with people in Bohax.  Offering Little Old Ladies rides home in my Mother's car.  Just always stood out.  As a teenager they called me "Dumb Bunny!" Nah, I wasn't really.  Just chose my fights.  Just felt things weren't important enough to worry about.  I knew the deal, I knew who was who and what was what.  I wasn't as naive as they thought I was.     Wore clothing that was different.  Never wanted to wear a bra, shoes or anything that made me unconfortable.  I stood out.  My hair was very blonde.  My eyes were very big.  I looked at the world with wonder.  I remember standing on the corner of Flatlands Avenue and East 53rd.  It was this vast intersection.  Well, it was to me then.  You had to run across lanes of traffic to get across.  It seems like forever to get across that intersection.  There was this little island of concret situated in the middle of the vastness of the intersection.  Where you could stand if you didn't make it across traffic.  I remember just standing there waiting for the traffic to slow down.  That was the place I would stand while going to anywhere.  Yup, I stood out.  I did stand out. I do stand out.