South Carolina

Things here are moving so quickly.

Just this week hubby and I purchased a half acre in South Carolina.  Most of you know that my Mom and my Brother (his wife and four beautiful young daughters) live there.

It was always our intention to eventually move down there to be closer to my family.  The plan was to make the move in five years when hubby retires.  But things have happened to make those plans come to fruition a lot sooner.

Most likely we will be down there within a year.  Hubby and my brother will be building our home themselves.  It's going to be a very exciting year for us.  This will be our first home.  I can't wait to start picking out stuff.

The city ordiance in Easley state that the home must be at least 1,800 square feet.  That is really quite a large amount of space.  There will be four bedrooms. Of course, the master bedroom will be a master suite.  With our own bathroom and large walk in closet.  I also want a great big kitchen.  It isn't going to be a million dollar kitchen, but it has to be big.  I'll be getting all new appliances and some new furniture too.

After the house is finished they will start working on building a two and one half car garage.  Yup, that sounds silly one half car.  But that space will be a workshop for hubby.  Above the garage will be an apartment.  It will be for which ever of my children decide to get married first.  Most likely it my son will move in there.

I will write more are things progress.

Everything else is the same here.  I am in a pretty significant flare.  I'm still not sleeping.  And, am still having horrible dizzy spells.  Big bad headaches too.

Even with all these health issues I am still very happy.  Very excited is a better way to put it.

Love you all,

LuAnne

PAIN (SEE DAWN'S JOURNAL)

Please read Dawn's journal entry..........

http://journals.aol.com/princesssaurora/CarpeDiem/entries/2007/02/28/chronic-pain---debunking-the-myths/2595

My mood is always loopy when I am in pain.  And, in pain I am.  Aside from those crazy auto immune things I have going on, I also have a horrible spine.  My spine is a mess.  There is severe spinal stenosis going on.  Anklosing Spondolytis, Degenerative Disc Disease, too.  Plus, because of my blood clotting disorder APS, I have a number of blood tumors located through out the spine.  These tumors, we believe, have come because of either injury (I fall down the stairs a lot), or because of the inflammatory process, or just because I have a blood clotting disorder. They are unsure if they can be removed or not.  Sophisticated tests such as MRIs and CATs do not show the intricate make up of these tumors.  Meaning if blood vessels, etc are entwined within them.  So the only way to find out would be to go in there and take a look.  Nah, I don't think so.  I am not ready for anyone to poke around in my spine.

In 1975 my grandfather, who also had Anklosing Spondolytis, had extensive spinal surgery.  He ended up a cripple.  Now, I understand the reasons for his inability to walk.  It was 1975 surgical techniques were not as sophisticated as they are now.  He wasn't a very receptive patient and did not do the PT exercises necessary to keep his spine from fusing.  AS was a relatively new, un researched illness at that time.  But, still I am not ready to take any chances.  He had a rod put in his spine.  His surgery was 8 hours long.  Ouch.

Plus, because of the anticoagulation therapy (Jantoven, which is a generic Coumadin) there is a protocol I need to follow before any surgery.  I need to stop taking the Jantoven and go on Lovenox (which is low molecular weight heparin).  With Lovenox there is a high risk of paralysis when having spinal surgery.  So, I need to stop the Lovenox at least 24 hours (if not more) before the surgery.  Therefore, I will be unprotected during that time.  Which means I am at a high risk of throwing a clot and suffering another stroke.  Or pulmonary embolism or MI.  I've already had two strokes and I was lucky to have survived them with minimal damage. I was left with a seizure disorder and some left sided weakness.  I am not going to push my luck.

Yes, for a normal person, there is still a risk.  But it's normal risk.  I am not normal.  I am a science project.  Yes, if I have the surgery to remove the tumors my pain will diminish drastically.  I am still not ready to take the chance.

So I, monthly, visit my pain management doctor and leave with a fist full of prescriptions.  I keep this monthly appointment no matter what.  I don't think I have ever rescheduled.  I go there sick.  I go there no matter what.  And, yes my body is dependent upon the meds he prescribes.  But, no I am not addicted.  I don't buy drugs on the street.  I don't go crazy and sell my stuff to buy my meds.  I take what is prescribed and have only one or two times taken more than I was instructed.  I only did this after a phone call to my doctor.  I am on what is called a Duragesic Patch.  I take a high dosage of this.  I am also given something for breakthrough pain.  I think it's percocette or morphine.  It's generic so I am not sure.

My Lupus pain is managed wonderfully with these meds.  My back pain is another story.  Not a day goes by when I can say I have no pain. The pain caused by my back woes is so intense I cry, no sob in pain usually daily.  My sleep is disturbed because the pain wakes me up.

But, I go on.  I do the laundry.  I cook dinner.  I do stuff.  I just don't go out much.  I just don't think it's necessary for me to go out.  I don't have anything to do during the day except to go out and spend money.  So, why bother. There is nothing I need to buy.  We do our food shopping every two or three weeks.  And, if I can't do it, my daughter and her boyfriend do it for me.  They go armed with a shopping list, coupons and my Visa card.  She is actually better at it than I am.  She works in Pathmark so she knows all the prices.  She collects coupons so she always saves lots of money.  And, I think that they pretend to be a married couple doing their food shopping.  How cute is that?

When I can't cook or do laundry I don't.  My daughter does the laundry for the family.  And, because when I do cook, I cook a lot extra we always have left overs in the frige to eat or an entire meal in the freezer.  Or we order out.  I have two wonderful women who come here every two weeks (or every week, if I choose) to clean my house.

Living with pain is not a choice anyone would make.  Having or complaining about pain is not something most like to do.  I would prefer to be able to be silent about my pain.  But, I am unable to do that.  My pain makes me cry.  My pain makes me moan in my sleep.  A few times my pain has gotten so bad (a 10 or even more) that my body has gone into contractions.  My pain has caused me to have seizures.  I have vomited because the pain is so bad.

So, I gladly take the pain meds and prednisione that is prescribed for me.  And, I could care less if my body is dependent on them.

Thank you Dawn My Friend for bringing this to light.  People need to know about chronic pain.  I find it funny when people make uneducated, ignorant comments.  I know one person who makes more insensitive comments than I care to count.  This is the same person who after a colonoscopy took to her bed for two days.  The same person who after a root canal had to lay call in sick for three days.  Forget it when she gets a headache, the world ends.  I just laugh, that is all I can do.  Because trying to rationalize these things with her is useless.  I just hope that people like this never have to suffer chronic debilitating pain.  I pray that they never know what it is like.  Because I believe that they COULD NOT handle it.

Those of us who suffer from this type of pain are, indeed, strong individuals.  Our lives do not end.  We deal and try to move on.  Even when we can't we try.  Our lives have changed drastically due to our illnesses and the pain that accompanies them.  But, we are still strong.

Hugs, Lu

A GROWN UP SON???

As many of you know, I have a son. 

 He is 21 years old.  He is a good young man who is very responsible and self sufficient.  Plus (and not just because he is my son) he is very handsome.  He's tall and lean.  His new look is sort of like the beatnik from Doby Gillis.  If anyone can remember that show from many years ago.

There is one thing that is not good about him.  He has become very disrespectful.  He picks on me and answers me back.  He has even hung the phone up on me.  I don't understand what is going on.  I know there is no underlying problem.  No drug use.  The kid won't even be around someone who smokes cigarettes.  I am sure of this.

His disrespect fullness is getting to me big time.  No matter what I say, he jumps down my throat.  I've brought this up with hubby but it's no use.  All I get from him is that it's my own fault.  I don't see how that is possible.  Because if trying to help.  Or, asking a question is my fault.  Then maybe it is.

How can this be possible?

I guess I should be happy that he only does this with me.  With EVERYONE else he is just the perfect young man.  Respectful, helpful and kind.  But with me he is not.  And, I am proud of him.  In all areas of his life he is great.  Smart and responsible.

It's gotten to the point that I am afraid to ask him a question.  For fear that he is going to jump down my throat.    Even when I told him how much I liked his girlfriend.  And, that she seems sweet.  I told him that she was cute. He yelled at me.

I have been crying for most of the morning.

It happened again this morning.  He got a new dresser for his room and I asked him if there was anything he wanted me to do in there.  He said, "No, just leave everything along because I have my computer stuff all over the place!"  I then asked him if he had any dishes or dirty clothes in there.  He jumped down my throat.  "Didn't I just ask you to stay out of there?"

I just started to cry and ask him to please stop being disrespectful.  I was sobbing actually.  I am still sobbing.  I just cannot stop.

He proceeded to leavefor work, but turned around and came up the stair and hugged me.  That was nice, but I am still crying.  I just don't understand what I did to deserve being treated like this.

Yeah, I get it that he is at a point in his life where he is paving his way.  I get it that he is not really a grown up but trying to be one.  I know that you always hurt the one you love.  But I don't get this.

It's really hurting me.

Computer - Color Pyramid

I saw this over at Dawn's journal. http://journals.aol.com/princesssaurora/CarpeDiem/

Things You See While at Your Computer - Color Pyramid

Name 6 red things that you see from where you sit.

1.    The dust cover of The Settlement Cookbook

2.    Webster's New Compact Desk Dictionary.

3.    A can of Staticide Precision 2000 Dust Remover.

4.    My red crocheted couch doiley.

5.    The red strip along the cover of Sandra Lee's Semi Homemade Cooking 2

6.    A red folder

Name 5 blue things you see from where you sit.

1.    Part of the dust jacket for The Lupus Book.
2.    My computer background.

3.    Blue in the plaid of hubby's pjs.

4.    The blue display of our Lexmark printer.

5.    My dog's collar.

Name 4 green things you see from where you sit.

1.    Two Vintage Meta Given's Modern Encyclopedia of Cooking Cookbooks.

2.    My carpet (actually it's teal).

3.    Hubby's green Carhardt zippered sweatshirt.

4.    One of the colors of my Fenton Glass Clown.

Name 3 yellow things you see from where you sit.

1.    The flame of my caramel wood wick candle.

2.    The computer hutch light.

3.    Hubby's NEC 2005 Handbook

Name 2 purple things you see from where you sit.

1.    A purple ceramic eggplant in a basket (among other veggies) I made in ceramics years ago.

2.    A purple Lupus bracelet.

Name 1 black thing you see from where you sit.

1.    A black pen

Take My Quiz

http://www02.quizyourfriends.com/quizpage.php?quizname=070212170106-296157&

Monday Morning

Good Morning My Friends.    

I am feeling happy this morning even though I am in pain.  I have a sharp pain in my lower left groin area.  I'm thinking it's my diverticulitis acting up.  Who knows?

Gary was home from work this weekend.  It's not all that often that he has two full days off.  We hung around the house and relaxed.  We were going to go to Applebee's for dinner on Saturday evening, but I ended up sleeping most of the day.  I woke up at around 4 and thought that I would just get into the shower and off we would go.  Nope.  I could not get myself together.  I was just too drained to go out.  So, Gary made us some hot dogs, fries and beans.  And, we ate that.  It was just delicious.  I love hot dogs.

Have I mentioned lately about how wonderful my husband is?  I am a very lucky woman.  Gary takes such good care of me.  Actually he takes good care of all of us.  He always picks up the slack around here. I am very proud of him and love him so much. And, for the last four years there has been a lot of slack due to my illnesses.  Sometimes we get caught up in the drama of our illness that we fail to see the wonder around us.  I am trying not to forget the great things in my life.  My husband and two great children. 

I am so proud of my children too.  They are almost grown ups.  Well, my son is 21 and my daughter is 19.  Is that considered a grown up these days?  They are very responsible young adults.  I rag on them, but if the truth be told, I love to brag about them.  I should tell them more often.  It's not often that children these days are so in tune with the important things in life.  My children are.  They are respectful and loving.  We all have our days, but I couldn't ask for a better family.

You know the phrase, "She is my right arm!"  Well, my daughter is so much more than that.  She is my body.  There is no way in the world that I could get along without her.  I really think that I put too much burden on her.  I ask her to do virtually everything for me.  And, she does it.  Sometimes grudgingly, most of the time lovingly.  I don't give her nearly enough credit for all that she does. 

 Plus she works and is going to college.  She is my salvation when I am unable to do things.  Which is most of the time.  Thank you my dear daughter. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!  I don't say that nearly enough.

My son gave me my Valentine's Day gift early this year.  It is a gift certificate to a spa.  I can choose from a list of services.    http://www.relaxoncloud9.com/  Of course the first thing I am going to get is a full body massage.  Maybe a foot scrub or hand and feet paraffin treatments.  Or even a scalp massage/treatment.  I could use some facial waxing (the prednisione makes a face pretty stubby).  I'm so looking forward to this.  I'll be calling later on today to schedule an appointment.  As soon as I decide exactly what I want, that is.

Hubby took his test on the 3rd.  He said it was easier than he thought it would be.  Less technical.  He is pretty confident that he did well.  I had no doubt.  If anyone knows electrical, it's my Gary.  After the test, they allowed them to write down their answers and gave them a web site to check the answer key for this test.  They said to give it about 5 weeks.  You know I check daily.  LOL

Yesterday morning I put a turkey in the oven.  If you remember, this past Thanksgiving I ordered the entire dinner from Stop and Shop and it was delicious.  But, as many of the supermarkets do, for every so much you spend you get a choice of a turkey, turkey breast, ham or veggie lasagna.  So, I had a free turkey in the freezer downstairs.  I put it in one of those oven bags and cooked it yesterday.  I didn't make all the trimmings we just picked at it all day.  After I took all the meat off the bones, I put them in a pot and simmered them for a few hours.  Wednesday I am going to make soup.  We are expecting a big winter storm.  It will be a good day for some soup.  I make mine similar to the Italian Wedding Soup.  Aside from the usual soup veggies I put in tiny little meatballs.  I mean tiny, like the size of a marble.  I'm not sure if I am going to put rice, orzo or just some elbows in it.  I am looking forward to it.

Those of you who know Loretta from  http://journals.aol.com/lrttklly/LupusLeftovers need to go check out http://www.cafepress.com/wingasworld . Loretta has designed some stuff like tee shirts, hats, mouse pads.  I have my order already in the shopping cart ready for me to pay for.  Our Loretta is a very talented artist.  We already know how gifted she is at writing, now we see another side of Loretta.  Loretta has been my online friend for just about four years now. This wonderful woman has, many times, been a rock and sounding board for me.  She always hasvery insightful advice.  And, she is very adept at just listening.  Loretta is the epitome of the meaning of a friend.  She knows just the right thing to say.  She is sympathetic and understanding.  Loretta doesn't only coddle.  She has, lovingly pointed out if I am wrong.  It's a rare individual who can combine all these things.  Loretta is a very special woman.  And, if you haven't read her blogs you are missing out on a lot.  I enjoy our chats.  I only wish we were closer in location so that once in a while we could chat over a cup of coffee. Loretta and I pretty much got sick at the same time.  I met her on AOL's Lupus General Discussion Board.  We grew into our Lupus and it's complications together.  Both of us are basically homebound.  I don't know how she manages.  Her Little Bear is young.  It's so hard being ill and having to care for a young child.  Loretta and her family are always in my prayers.  I am thankful for a friend like her.

Boy has this been a long entry.  I have more to write but will save it for another time.  For those of you who made it all the way to the end of this entry.  Thank you.  I just needed to write this morning.

Have a wonderful day gentle readers.

Oh one more very important thing.  Please keep Krissy and John in your prayers.  John has an appointment with the spleen surgeon on Wednesday.  Check out Krissy's entry today, it's been quite a week for them.  http://journals.aol.com/fisherkristina/SometimesIThink/

Hugs,

 

 

Proverbs 3:11-12

My son, do not despise the chastening of the LORD, Nor detest His correction; 

For whom the LORD loves He corrects, Just as a father the son in whom he delights.

Proverbs 3:11-12 (New King James Version)

Just felt like adding this verse this morning.  Each morning I receive an email from mail a verse.com.  Today's verse.  You can add verses to your site.  I haven't done it yet.

Add the verse to your web site:
http://www.verse-a-day.com/js/index.php

Lauren is sick.  She woke up with a very bad sore throat and headache.  No fever. I made her some tea.  It soothed her throat some I think.  My poor baby, as old as they get, they are still little kids when they are sick.  I think she is coming with me to the doctor this afternoon.  Pray she feels better soon.

That's it for now.  Hugs, Lu